


Heavy is the head that wears the crown

by Youmiscalculated



Category: The Owl House (Cartoon)
Genre: Angst, Crushes, F/F, One-Sided Attraction, Unrequited Crush, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-09
Updated: 2020-08-09
Packaged: 2021-03-06 00:40:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,626
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25804504
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Youmiscalculated/pseuds/Youmiscalculated
Summary: Grom aftermath
Relationships: Amity Blight/Luz Noceda
Comments: 5
Kudos: 129





	Heavy is the head that wears the crown

Amity musters up the confidence to talk to Luz about her feelings, before doubt creeps in. No one is that nice and compassionate, right? She weighed her pros and cons again for the hundredth time. Yeah, maybe it's best to just keep it in.

Luz is like this to everyone, she’s so bright so full of wit and charm, why is Amity so special to think that Luz would treat her differently or to even love her differently than the others,

Just because Amity has a higher status doesn’t mean she deserves Luz, she isn’t a prize to be won and what does Luz care about status anyway,

She knows she's still too weak to be with her. She couldn't fight for her friendship with Willow, how could she ever fight for a relationship with Luz? After all, Blights only associate with the strongest of witchlings. It will never work out.

Blights uphold tradition and honour and by being with not only a girl but a human girl would be unheard of and looked down upon. For now, she has to be satisfied with.... _this_. Whatever this is. She can't risk anything ruining it, not even Amity herself. Plus, it’s selfish to be more, to have more. She has to be satisfied... right? No, she NEEDS to be satisfied.

She was stupid to have even let the idea of there ever being more be in her mind

Oh, so _stupid_

By being in love with one of her friends she has betrayed her family and if Luz ever rejected her the last shred of hope would be ripped from her and torn apart just like the note

She'll lose her; she'll lose everything she had worked hard for. It's not worth it. Not worth it. It's best to just let it be, to let this be. She could enjoy her hands on her own, the beaming smile directed to her. What else is there to ask for? And even if she did try, Luz never seemed to notice, Luz acted as if nothing happened as if she meant nothing. At least it wasn’t awkward Amity could give credit to that, but since the feelings emerged everything around Amity felt out of control and everything felt awful. Not once in her life did Amity thought that someone who provided her with so much happiness would also be the one to cause her so much pain. Ah, every time she comes near her, it's always trouble.

Amity dropped her head in her hands in a frustrated huff, the noise, the crowd, watchful gazes and whispers about tonight’s Grom queens felt suffocating. She was too exhausted to fight back her emotions, right now all she wanted was to go home and forget about this stupid night. Her hands fiddled with her prize, focusing on the glow the crown emits under moonlight. It's beautiful, she thinks. She traced her eyes to the other crown, her heart clenching in hurt. She agrees wholeheartedly. It's so beautiful. The moonlight did little to hold back the darkness but she didn’t mind, in the darkness of the corner she felt safe, Amity knew Luz wouldn’t be here long and she ached to go with her, maybe her parents would breathe a sigh of relief when their embarrassment of a daughter was gone, After what happened with Grom, her forfeiting and leaving it to the human... She doubts that her parents will give her a warm welcome. She didn't defeat Grom on her own. She had help. That is not something a strong, dependable, and superior Blight would do. She felt her shoulders heave as she gave in to her emotions

Stupid Amity

Childish Amity

Selfish Amity

Taking the easy way out instead of facing her own problems here she was tucked away in the corner of her room, and she only hated herself more for it. She wondered if she could sneak into the library again. There's so much she wanted to say, so much she wanted to write. After all, that's all she could do. There's no one left in the Boiling Isles to save her from these nagging nightmares that haunts her in the waking hours. Her mind still racing she quietly slipped into the cool shadows of the corridor, even with Luz’s almost aggressive optimism she still had every right to be mad or even hate Amity after all she had actively tried to ruin Luz’s life, a love confession wasn’t going to undo that

Gravel crunched under her feet, as the cold winds touched her skin. She suddenly remembers her dance-- their dance. How much she felt safe in Luz' arms as she caught her. She wanted to feel that again, the safety and comfort in the split second. To rush back into the warm embrace.

So much had changed in such little time it was exhausting and her head was spinning trying to keep up with it all, but with Luz she could be happy, warmth grew in her chest making her feel better then she had in weeks, she can’t risk this crush pushing Luz away

She felt herself brave enough to rush back in, to rip the band-aid off, as what Luz would say. However, the looming dread held her back. She stood there, her body shivering. Maybe it's too cold outside, but Amity knows otherwise. She had weighed the chances the doubts in her mind and the risk of humiliation was too high, she drew her arms around herself shielding herself from the cold, she was a blight first and every sense of the word made her feel numb. She turned away from the wretched school, this horrible cesspool of pain and suffering. She grabs the crown on her head, raising it with clenched fist.

She's no queen.

She wanted to throw it as far away as possible, roaring the turmoil that filled her heart.

Amity turned on her heel and stormed away from the school, she was so angry she could barely even breath. She throws the crown on the ground the gems cracking on impact. All her life she had been the perfect child never causing trouble, why did it feel so good to do this? Hot tears pricked her eyes. No. She can't show weakness. She can't crack. She sees the crown reform, as if mocking her and her entire being. It didn't matter how much effort she gave to come out on top. She's the loser in this game they call life. The giddy rush of disobedience quickly fades off as she collapses to the ground the bitter tears sting her cheeks, Amity feels the cold embrace of uncertainty as she gasps for air, she snatches the crown and stuffs it into her dress she’s too far from Hexside, she has to go home.

She ran as fast as she could, as if she could run away from the monsters that live in her head. Her heart beats fast, allowing blood to rush for a different kind of reason. She didn't want her destination, but the journey makes it worth it. Her life had been torn apart since Luz arrived and there was absolutely no way her parents didn’t know and Amity begged they refused to address it she begged that they’d be too ashamed to even mention Luz, the blight house loomed in the distance, there was only one way to find out.

She bounded up to the imposing door, finally entering her house. Everything is dark, but she felt the air become heavy. It was as cold inside as it was in the outside. Amity huffed, thinking that it's same with the people that lived in it. The twins were still at Grom Amity had noted that before she had her temper tantrum, Amity’s self resentment grew seriously a temper tantrum at 14, Amity brought the crown up the light her parents would want to see her trophy how would she explain the state of it. That is, if her parents are even at home.

Would it be good news? Bad news? Every feeling she has is in conflict with the other. Ridiculous. She haphazardly placed the crown on a nearby table. They'll notice it if they wanted to notice it. Amity was jolted by a warm hand on her shoulder

“Is that yours darling?”

Amity felt a chill run down her as her mother swooped in to inspect the crown her nimble fingers tracing over the crack in the gem.

“Aren’t you going to wear it? You’re the rightful Grom queen after all..”

Her voice was stern, with a hint of warmth. And yet, why does it feel so empty of pride nor compassion?

"Oh dear, what happened?"

Her mother wondered aloud. Her eyes grew more sinister and much crueller.

"How unfortunate it is to see it... _besmirched_."

Amity’s heart sank.

“I’m sorry”

her voice was small she was too tired to fight with her mother,

“Don’t be sorry” her voice was stern as she lifted Amity’s head up with one finger as if she would stain her delicate skin “A fitting crown I believe”

"I--"

She started before she bit her tongue. The woman placed the crown back on her now bowed head.

"Don't think I didn't hear what happened." She circled around, a harsh hand gripping her shoulder. "After all, the walls have ears.... and eyes."

Hesitatingly, Amity looked up to face her mother,

“You are a blight you should’ve known better” her mother’s grip loosened before she wiped her hands on her dress stained from the embarrassment, the air bitter as the seconds seemed to drag on her lips pursed

“Run along now”

Amity stepped back with a slow retreat. After all, Blights do not run.

**Author's Note:**

> we really wanted angst so we wrote this on our twitter timeline (@sapphiceda + @15081415CA)


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